Question:
I guess my question is asked in the 'Subject:' line but here it is again: What are the signs and/or symptoms of depression?
Answer:
Check out a DSM manual.
Or visit some of the major depression web sites.
Basically you feel like crap all the time. I am not sure if I am depressed or not. Always feel down at times because
my life has changed after marriage, buying a house, etc. The neighborhood
I live in is not very friendly. We (my wife and I) have tried to become
socialable with others, but it seems we do not fit in this neighborhood.
My wife and I do not have kids as everyone else around us has kids. Seems
like there is some prejudice towards a married couple not having kids. I
guess this is the tip of the iceberg, but there are many other situations
involved. My wife and I took the quiz on the following web page:
http://www.cmhc.com/guide/dep2quiz.htm
The results were I was borderline depressed and my wife is worse than I.
Basically we discussed the results and figured it was the neighborhood.
This subdivision has many kids and many parents seems not to watch their
kids. When these kids wants to cut through our yard, which my wife and I
like to keep our yard looking good, we said something to one of the
parents and what we asked has been turned to something else very
different. The neighbors seem not to have any respect for anyone else
outside of their group or like themselves. We basically have been
ignoring everyone since they have been spreading false rumors about us;
which we found out last night.
My wife and I discussed about moving to another neighborhood. Although we
have barely been in this house two years, buying and moving to another
house (or condo) may not be financially possible. We keep to ourselves a
lot and have not attempted to socialize with anyone in the neighborhood.
After hearing one of the neighbors informing us everyone around here does
not like us, we asked why. The person could not tell us much, but no one
in this neighborhood like us. For one, this really does not bother me
since no one has talked to us nor get to know us.
Oh well, maybe it is not directly depression but more frustration.
This sounds like a tough situation. The best thing that I could think of
without moving away is to put up a fence around your yard. This sounds too
simple, I know, but it will keep the kids out of your yard. If you can get
past having to complain to the neighbors about their kids, then you won't have
to talk to them at all if you don't want to.
The thing about rumors is that most people will see right through them after
time passes. If you can just "grin and bear it" for a while, people will
forget. Only say nice things to people even when they are being jerks. If you
respond to them negatively it just adds fuel to their fire. Then they run
right back to their friends and twist it around to serve their purpose. They
will get bored after awhile if they can't get a response out of you. I'm sorry
you live in such a place. Unfortunately we don't always know these things
before we move.
