Question:
I haven't been diagnosed or
even assessed yet. I'm going to see my doctor to discuss the
situation so we'll see what happens from there. I am in no doubt that
I am suffering from quite severe depression at the moment but I wonder
about bipolar disorder as well. I have been prone to depression since my late teens. At
times it has been quite severe. I took Prozac (20mg daily) between 1999
and 2002. I first noticed the signs of depression when I was at college. The usual symptoms appeared: lack of motivation, lack of confidence,
inability to concentrate, not wanting to speak to people, low moods,
weight gain, sleeping a lot, etc.I found Prozac very effective in lifting the gloom, but there were side
effects - I became quite restless after a few months and my sex drive
was badly affected. I would be grateful for anybody's comments on my situation. I'm not
sure if I have any specific questions to ask.
Answer:
Well, bipolar is sort of the diagnoses du jour, but it does sound like
you're making serious efforts to understand what is going on. I think
the definition of bipolar has broadened greatly in the last decade ...
but what does that mean really? That people who were not considered
bipolar in 1989 now qualify? I'm confused myself and want to take that
test you posted a linke to. I've been diagnozed with so many
contradictory things I don't know what to think anymore. What is
normal today? When you go for 15 hours straight without tiring, is it because you
love the project you're doing and things are looking up? Or do you
just seem to have this extra burst of energy for no reason?
I've been like that myself, but usually or almost always with something
I really enjoy and am getting into. I'm a perfectionist too and a bit
obsessive, so that contributes. But I don't think in my case that's
"manic" -- "manic" to me is jumping up and down like your name has just
been called on The Price Is Right game show. That's not me.
I was misdiagnosed as bipolar and the
results of that were nearly two years of living hell and bad
suicidal episodes because of different varieties of mood
modifiers that I should not have been taking. Once again the
diagnosis was quickly made by a so called expert. The psychiatrist that sorted me out was a Belgian with a
reputation for being radical. He has introduced the word, at
least to me, 'tendencies' into diagnosis of depression.
He said all people cycle. It is the nature of being human. Some
cycle more, or more overtly, than others but would still fit into
the range of 'normal'. Creatives are indeed renowned for mental
disease but also for being uniquely motivated with tendencies
that, with the addition of real problems, can indicate to an
observer that they are bipolar.
The first questions he asked me was about my job and my hobbies
and lifestyle. He quickly established that I was most definitely
a creative and had to be looked at with that in mind.
He realized I wasn't bipolar at all. What I had was Disthymia
coupled with PTSD in a naturally creative personality. He
described it as "bipolar tendencies".
